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Thread: Bride and Grooms Attitudes / Current Trends

  1. #1

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    Default Bride and Grooms Attitudes / Current Trends

    Not meant as just a negative thread, but have recently had a lot of conversations with other suppliers, venues etc about how the needs/wants/attitudes of Brides and Grooms seem to be changing rapidly.

    A few things I have noticed are :

    1. Feedback is VERY rare. Even some of the top venues say they never ever really receive any feedback or reviews from clients. That is, of course, unless you ask for it.

    2. Detailed Planning - most weddings now seem to go into every minute detail with military precision planning.

    3. More about what 'they' want - yes, I have noticed that more couples, especially with the music, don't always consider other guests, it is more about what they want.

    4. Freebies - not a free disco, but getting a lot of people trying to add on extra time (for example) without realising this will come at a cost. Similar with uplighting etc, they think it will be free - probably because most DJs will do everything for free.

    5. Less other stuff - I think I now see a led dancefloor at maybe 10% of weddings and a photobooth at maybe 20%. Even bands are becoming more rare - quite often it is simply the DJ and Disco on an evening

    6. Not wanting to meet - Although I don't labour it like I used too, couples don't seem interested in wanting to meet. Every email I send I offer to pop out for a chat, but if I have 10 client meetings a year I am lucky. Mind you, I do have a number of brides who have booked because I keep things simple and they don't want the hassle of meeting, needing a degree to work out what it will cost, or be baffled with things they know nothing about.



    Anyone have any thoughts or other things they have noticed ?
    Semi-Retired Multi Award Winning DJ

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  2. #2
    Resident Antagonist Benny Smyth's Avatar
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    It's been a long time since I've seen a dancefloor. Photobooths in the 'traditional' sense are also rare, but I have noticed alternatives to that (on Saturday, there was a hot air balloon basket with small balloons attached that was used as a photobooth and I honestly loved it).

    I've actually found that my clients are a lot more relaxed than they used to be. Maybe I have 'matured' my approach to help facilitate that, but I don't believe that it is the main factor (if it is one at all) - I just find that my clients are very chilled at the moment. With the exception of some slow replyers, I still have no problems organising meetings. I reckon at least 75% are face-to-face and the rest either by phone or Skype (and that is always down to logistics over not wanting a meeting), but I always have a meeting/chat.

    One thing I will say is that the value of the evening entertainment seems to be holding a lot more weight now. I can count one occasion off the top of my head that I have felt like 'and disco' for a few years now. I think what's happened is that the days of the "it's just a disco, why pay more?" mentality have scarred the current generation of newlyweds to the point where they want to avoid that car crash of a party that they went to down the Social Club for Auntie Sue's 50th.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    1. Feedback is VERY rare. Even some of the top venues say they never ever really receive any feedback or reviews from clients. That is, of course, unless you ask for it.
    That's why my DJEP system ALWAYS asks for it . To be sent feedback out of the blue is getting very, very rare (although I've had several that have done so without prompting so far this year).

    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    2. Detailed Planning - most weddings now seem to go into every minute detail with military precision planning.
    I'm not seeing too much of this at the moment (although this coming Saturday seems to have a lot of it going on with a very precise setup time of 5.15)

    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    3. More about what 'they' want - yes, I have noticed that more couples, especially with the music, don't always consider other guests, it is more about what they want.
    Again, not too much of this at the moment. If truth be told, I'm getting more and more of a free reign on what I play as opposed to getting sheets and sheets of playlists.

    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    4. Freebies - not a free disco, but getting a lot of people trying to add on extra time (for example) without realising this will come at a cost. Similar with uplighting etc, they think it will be free - probably because most DJs will do everything for free.
    As in "can you set up a bit earlier?". Oh yuss!
    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    5. Less other stuff - I think I now see a led dancefloor at maybe 10% of weddings and a photobooth at maybe 20%. Even bands are becoming more rare - quite often it is simply the DJ and Disco on an evening
    Agreed. Candy carts seem to be dying off, photo booths are dying, LED dancefloor.....can't actually remember the last time I saw one of those. What I am seeing a big rise in at the moment is alternative entertainment such as magicians.

    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    6. Not wanting to meet - Although I don't labour it like I used too, couples don't seem interested in wanting to meet. Every email I send I offer to pop out for a chat, but if I have 10 client meetings a year I am lucky. Mind you, I do have a number of brides who have booked because I keep things simple and they don't want the hassle of meeting, needing a degree to work out what it will cost, or be baffled with things they know nothing about.
    This used to be a huge bugbear for me. I used to hate going into a wedding blind, but meetings (and even skype/phonecalls) were getting to be somewhate of a rarity for me, especially for evening only stuff these days. Longer weddings (afternoon reception and all day I insist on it and I've never had any objections....but then they're spending a lot of money for those services and there are things which HAVE to be done right).

    Like you, I'm finding the KISS attitude to be working at the moment. Couples at the moment just don't seem to want complications.

    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    Anyone have any thoughts or other things they have noticed ?
    Yup - I'm having to work harder and harder to secure each wedding I do at the moment. Not in the amount of work or what I do on the day, it's more chasing people after the initial conversation, chase them for payment, chase them for additional information such as first dance stuff and how they want to be introduced etc. Now if they'd only meet up.....

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Benny Smyth View Post
    they want to avoid that car crash of a party that they went to down the Social Club for Auntie Sue's 50th.
    Oi Benny, I did that disco! Thought it went well, all things considered.

    Don't think I can really use " Regional Differences " to back up why I don't altogether share the views of Chris, Benny and Wayne, since they bracket me geographically.

    I'm seeing more DIY weddings, where they hire a venue as a blank canvas, and shape it to their wishes, which sort of fits 2 and 3. Photobooths are regularly seen still, and couples like ( grudgingly agree? ) to meet me on a regular basis. I often suggest this for other gigs, where it's a little left of centre, and it's welcomed.

    I'm seeing loads of " other stuff ", some of which seems to add little to the gig. As to Freebies, I think that unless it's been detailed in the quote, some couples genuinely don't see something like an early setup as grounds for a surcharge. And come on lads, how often have I seen on here " I couldn't lower the price, but I threw in uplighting/karaoke/microphones/whatever to seal the deal?

    And Benny, re " main entertainment", I just lost one because the band " can provide the disco as well ". Yeah right, love. We believe they're going to hang around till 2am while their roadie bangs out the anthems on their PA like Tiesto. I'm not discounting a phone call on the day on that one, when they realise what they will get.
    Excalibur. Older than the average DJ.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Excalibur View Post
    And Benny, re " main entertainment", I just lost one because the band " can provide the disco as well ". Yeah right, love. We believe they're going to hang around till 2am while their roadie bangs out the anthems on their PA like Tiesto. I'm not discounting a phone call on the day on that one, when they realise what they will get.

    I experienced that second hand back at the old venue. I was playing down "in the Hall" when the manager came in at 1030pm and asked me what I was doing from 11pm? Wierd, I thought, as I was booked until 1230. The wedding "upstairs" in the main function room had a band, who were also providing "the music", so the b&G thought. Yes, they were, but that was background while the evening guests arrived,during the buffet and during the band's 20 minute interval (that must have been interesting). But when the band finisted (due at 11pm) they were packing up and going, leaving the room full of silence for the next couple of hours.

    Jokingly, I offered to move my gear up to the big room and combine the two functions. Would you, said the manager. How long would that take.

    Well, about 90 minutes I said, by which time, both weddings would have come to an end.

    So the decision (no choice really) was to leave my wedding pounding along and the other one, who had booked their own entertainment (i.e. band) were left to fend for themselves. The B&G, when the music stopped and they were told that the band were going home asked the hotel if they could get them a DJ! What, at 1115pm on a Saturday night for a function that would be finishing at 1230am. OK then!!

    Then they had the temerity to complain to the venue that they thought the venue would be supplying the DJ anyway. Not if you haven't booked and paid for one they don't.

    My room was too small for theother wedding to decamp to and myB&G probably wouldn't have liked it anyway, though I think we did have a couple of gate crashers.

    Meanwhile, the other wedding party removed themselves to the bar and put MTV or something on the telly!

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post

    2. Detailed Planning - most weddings now seem to go into every minute detail with military precision planning.
    Just to add to this - had a look through some of my booking on DJI and 2 for 2022 have already completed their planning form and also filled in their song requests - talk about being organised lol
    Semi-Retired Multi Award Winning DJ

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    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    Just to add to this - had a look through some of my booking on DJI and 2 for 2022 have already completed their planning form and also filled in their song requests - talk about being organised lol
    And in the interest of fairness, I was given my First Dance (on CD and USB stick) on arrival at the venue on Saturday night.

  8. #8

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    My sister in law had this sort of thing.

    I was 'to take a night off', she booked an expensive wedding band, they were almost £2000 so that to me is pricey. They were supplying a dj she excitedly told me.

    I, of course, was not so convinced, so sniffed it out.

    On the night the band arrived and setup, so I asked them where the DJ was, DJ booth, lights etc (the band had a bank of PARs and one cheap dotty LED only), they said 'good point', and then drew straws as to who would be the 'dj' tonight, the winner, groaned that it was them.

    When it was time for the DJ, it was literally one of the female singers, with her back to the room, clicking a song list on iTunes. No mixing, no mic, no interaction, big gaps, totally awful. Everyone went outside as it was like an ipod was on.

    What could've been a good night (as a band they were fine, aside from being too loud for the small venue), was a bit rubbish.

    A random singer clicking a list is not a DJ.
    www.retrodisco.co.uk Mobile Disco and 80s Night Specialists, Devon

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    Dinosaur Excalibur's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Retrodisco View Post

    A random singer clicking a list is not a DJ.
    is the safest reply I could come up with. That sort of thing really winds me up.
    Excalibur. Older than the average DJ.

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  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    1. Feedback is VERY rare. Even some of the top venues say they never ever really receive any feedback or reviews from clients. That is, of course, unless you ask for it.
    In reality, have we ever received 'feedback'? I remember doing gigs in the late 90s and it was rare to receive a letter afterwards thanking us for it.

    Asking people for reviews is only beneficial to us. There's little incentive for couples to do it - and are now being bombarded by every service they use to provide feedback. I even had a text from Thames Water after a phone call to them, asking me to provide feedback on the phone call.

    The feedback is disproportionately important to us.


    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    2. Detailed Planning - most weddings now seem to go into every minute detail with military precision planning.
    I find it comes down to the couple. I do try and steer the few couples who head this way, away from trying to plan everything to the minute, as they'll only be disappointed when things don't run to time (unless there's a very good reason for things to be on time).

    However, I can be guilty of trying to go through the day in detail with them when hosting, so I can be prepared for what their expectations are!


    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    3. More about what 'they' want - yes, I have noticed that more couples, especially with the music, don't always consider other guests, it is more about what they want.
    No, totally the opposite for me. I typically attract couples who don't want to be the centre of attention. I regularly hear 'I want my family and friends to have a great time'. They are more worried about their guests' enjoyment than their own!


    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    4. Freebies - not a free disco, but getting a lot of people trying to add on extra time (for example) without realising this will come at a cost. Similar with uplighting etc, they think it will be free - probably because most DJs will do everything for free.
    No, not come across this either.


    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    5. Less other stuff - I think I now see a led dancefloor at maybe 10% of weddings and a photobooth at maybe 20%. Even bands are becoming more rare - quite often it is simply the DJ and Disco on an evening
    Still seeing lots of photobooths - around 80% of weddings have a full, proper photobooth.

    Agreed about the LED dancefloor, but equally, I don't push it. I think it's one of those elements that can be driven by the DJ.

    Typically, if a band gets booked, it's rare to also book the DJ as well. So there may be many weddings with bands - just we don't get a look in!


    Quote Originally Posted by ppentertainments View Post
    6. Not wanting to meet - Although I don't labour it like I used too, couples don't seem interested in wanting to meet. Every email I send I offer to pop out for a chat, but if I have 10 client meetings a year I am lucky. Mind you, I do have a number of brides who have booked because I keep things simple and they don't want the hassle of meeting, needing a degree to work out what it will cost, or be baffled with things they know nothing about.
    Yes, I'm finding less and less are that bothered about meeting. Most of what we do can be completed online with the online planner, and a phone call.

    Put ourselves in the shoes of our clients, and across a number of suppliers, including the venue, we all ask for a lot of information from our clients, who typically are busy people.

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