A Night i NEVER want to repeat

[soundsation]

I started a thread on here a few weeks ago asking for some help with a playlist i received for a party (the playlist which had some country stuff) I wasn't 100% happy with doing the party, i just had a gut feeling it wasn't going to be fun for some reason. So last night was the night. Got there to find it was a tiny tiny tiny venue. But no problems setting up. Started playing music, had everyone up from about half 8 - 12. So far so good... Ended the night at 12, as agreed, was really happy with the night and knew everyone had had a great night.. . . . . Then came the "one more song" chant, so i played another two songs whilst packing up. When i took the first load out to the car park i didnt realise a man had followed me out to behind my van where he continued to abuse me and swear at me over the fact that i didnt play any more songs. I explained that i was only booked until 12, but this was not good enough for him. I quickly attempted to get back inside so i wasnt totaly alone. While clearing the rest of my things he continued to throw my business cards in my face while saying i was F:Censored: S:Censored: . . . i am usually more then happy to go on for longer (obviously at a cost) but due to an emergency, which i explained, i really couldn't do any longer. This whole situation has really made me feel like throwing in the tail. Its totly taken the fun out of the whole thing for me now:(

[funkymook]

Sorry to hear that - no one should have to put up with that sort of abuse.

If you're not use to that sort of behaviour it can be quite a shock, that idiot will have forgotten about it as soon as he sobers up but unfortunately you're still left having to deal with it.

For some people this is how they talk and act all the time, so it doesn't mean anything or have the same impact to them as it does to us.

The only thing I can say (and I know it's easy to say) is don't take it personally, he doesn't know you so it can't be personal (you could've been anyone, barman who closed the bar etc), it meant nothing to him and it shouldn't have to mean anything to you.

You probably handled exactly how it should've been handled - it didn't end up getting physical and that's the best result you can hope for in these situations.

So don't carry this experience around with you, forget this idiot, he's not worth a second thought.

[Excalibur]

Martin is absolutely right, but even so, it leaves a bad taste in the mouth, and spoils a good night. Chin up mate.

[soundsation]

Thanks, Its a big shock, ive had it once before where i had a bloke follow me out to the car park because he wanted it to go on for longer, but i managed to sort it out with him pretty quickly, where as with this bloke it was quite different. I have never felt like i was so close to a smack, he was very intimidating and he quickly got everyone else on his side, even the bar staff, which didn't help matters!!!! At one point i was almost considering calling the police! I managed to pack up in seven minutes, has got to be a record! My van/equipment was a right mess, but i was just happy to be out and not hurt.

[yourdj]

Just blame it on the venue and tell him that there is a cut off time and you will get in trouble. I just say its the law and part of thier licence - they normally give up then.

Even better do a fake ending 10 mins before and you then have the two "one more" requests sorted with a couple of mins to spare. :)

They then have nothing to complain about (unless there is a big clock behind you of course).

[soundsation]

Just blame it on the venue and tell him that there is a cut off time and you will get in trouble. I just say its the law and part of thier licence - they normally give up then.

Even better do a fake ending 10 mins before and you then have the two "one more" requests sorted with a couple of mins to spare. :)

They then have nothing to complain about (unless there is a big clock behind you of course).


I gave it the whole im not allowed routine, my trouble was that the venue turned round and said we dont care how long you go on for! With that he then said to me this is my F:Censored: :Censored: :Censored: :Censored: :Censored: :Censored: brothers birthday and your telling me you can't go on for any longer, he then got his brothers girlfriend to come over who was crying and said now look what you've done. As i was going out the door a nice man did say to me "please do ignore them all, they are after trouble and they would have done this no matter what time you finished and no matter who the DJ was" I felt slightly better knowing i had someone on my side.

[funkymook]

Thanks, Its a big shock, ive had it once before where i had a bloke follow me out to the car park because he wanted it to go on for longer, but i managed to sort it out with him pretty quickly, where as with this bloke it was quite different. I have never felt like i was so close to a smack, he was very intimidating and he quickly got everyone else on his side, even the bar staff, which didn't help matters!!!! At one point i was almost considering calling the police! I managed to pack up in seven minutes, has got to be a record! My van/equipment was a right mess, but i was just happy to be out and not hurt.

Didn't realise the other guests were at it as well, and the staff! What sort of venue is that? (one you've blacklisted is the correct reply!).

As I said, you handled it really well to get out without it escalating.

[soundsation]

The venue has definitely been black listed. For everyone on here the venue was The Royal Oak Pub, Havering Atte Bower, Essex. I will never ever under any circumstances be returning. If there is any trouble at any functions between guests i wait inside until the crowds sort them selves out and go home as i don't want to end up in it, i had no choice at this venue but to just keep my fingers crossed and get on with it.

[yourdj]

Ah its a pub. That explains it.

People seem to think it is their house especially if they have been boozing there for years.

Forget it and focus on better venues :) Not worth worrying about just part of the job at times.

[Andy Goodtimes]

I agree with what has been said so far but it certainly doesn't help when the bar staff are on their side too.

Sorry to say its one of the bad sides of the job that you will experience from time to time and it doesn't have to be a pub either, even the top venues can attract pond life, especially nowadays with all these special cut price deals going on.

Difficult to deal with but it does sound as if you did ok, as already said put it down to experience and don't take it to heart, the good times outweigh the bad ones.

[NKR]

The venue has definitely been black listed. For everyone on here the venue was The Royal Oak Pub, Havering Atte Bower, Essex. I will never ever under any circumstances be returning. If there is any trouble at any functions between guests i wait inside until the crowds sort them selves out and go home as i don't want to end up in it, i had no choice at this venue but to just keep my fingers crossed and get on with it.

Don't do pubs is my golden rule. It has served us really well.

[JAMdisco]

Don't do pubs is my golden rule. It has served us really well.

Fair point and usually one I stick to as well but for some DJ's (especially in the early days) pubs are the only real income generator - besides, someone has to do them right?

I started off in a residency for £80 a night and while this is a low price it was the most he would pay, I didn't do this for very long as I was getting better paid jobs in nicer venues. On the plus side, the landlord didn't want up-to-date stuff, just mainly 60's, 70's & 80's (mainly to keep the youth element out) and this seemed to work ok but there was generally a fight somewhere nearby outside.

Like has already been said, blacklist the venue, forget the incident & focus on your next disco :)

[DAVESOUNDS SERVICES]

Thats the way! DONT EVER GO BACK and tell as many local DJs as you can.
I once had my car windscreen smashed by some thug i wouldnt play crap for!
I never ever webt back despite offers of private enclosed parking and extra security.I did my best to make sure other DJs didnt too!
Amazingly i still made money on the gig ( think the windscreen cost me 50 pounds to replace!
Ive no probs doing pub gigs over the years they are a good scource of income ( and fre gear storage!!!!)

[NKR]

Fair point and usually one I stick to as well but for some DJ's (especially in the early days) pubs are the only real income generator - besides, someone has to do them right?

I started off in a residency for £80 a night and while this is a low price it was the most he would pay, I didn't do this for very long as I was getting better paid jobs in nicer venues. On the plus side, the landlord didn't want up-to-date stuff, just mainly 60's, 70's & 80's (mainly to keep the youth element out) and this seemed to work ok but there was generally a fight somewhere nearby outside.

Like has already been said, blacklist the venue, forget the incident & focus on your next disco :)

I started in a pub too, but not doing private functions in one. If the landlord is paying the piper you have a bit more support. If the knob who is abusing you is paying, then its your problem not theirs (regardless of whether the idiots are regulars).

The way I deal with enquiries is this.

E-mail enquiry. Check venue - drop onto google maps, look at local area from the air and then street view. You can get a feel. If its not clever no quote. (I know most areas within a wide area anyway, so even a town can put me off). I also assess parking and potential threats from that point of view. We then rider where we want to park and its for them to sort it with the venue. No parky, no playey. No I won't leave it round the back in the dark with a trailer on where the second entrance means it could be swiped during the night.
Telephone enquiry. Take details of date and venue and say will check availability and then come back to them. Repeat above if I don't know the venue.

I know most areas and can generally make a call on the demographic as a result.

We don't do pubs full stop, its just not worth it. Unless its a posh eatery type, but drinking venues, nope.

[Pink Elephant]

I have had this twice recentle at private functions - why do people think they can abuse you.

At the one on NYE I just made an announcement that this is my place of work and if I had done the same back to the 'lady' at her work the police would have been called. The rest of the customers then saw it in a different light.

It is easy for us all to just say forget it, but it does effect you. To put it in a better light - how many gigs have you done that were great? Now how many have you had this done to you. If it is 100+ to 1 or 1000+ to 1 then you can see that the vast majority of people are nice and there are only a few :Censored: people out there.

Onwards and upwards.....:p

[Shakermaker Promotions]

Just to add my little bit -
Firstly, I'm glad everything turned out ok in the end and you didn't get hurt or your equipment didn't get damaged. It's a shame that you had a decent night and then it went downhill at the end. More of a shame because you were obviously pretty anxious beforehand, hence the posting earlier regarding the gig.

The idiot in question probably does it on a regular basis and thinks he's a hard man. When you have a situation where the DJ is on his own and that type of thing happens, it's not good. Definitely blacklist the venue...that's the first thing I would do. I would also be tempted to contact them and tell them that you were not happy with what happened (they didn't back you up and could have helped you get physical abuse in the end), saying that though...It's probably best to just put it down as experience and move on.

Try not to even think about it again. The good gigs will easily outweigh the bad ones I can guarantee that.

Most people usually have a bit of respect and will listen to you when you explain that you are unable to play anymore. I announce the last song around 10 minutes before the end so that I finish on time even if I have played "One More!" for someone. I also use the 'Blame the venue' routine sometimes. The problem is, at the time...if the dancefloor still has lots of people on it and someone shouts "One More!", you are the focus of attention and put on the spot and people seem to take advantage of that. I always try to get someone from the venue to turn the house lights on around 1 minute from the end of the song so that it gets the message across.

Lastly, sometimes people WILL listen and if you can be bothered to explain to them, I put it like this - It's a bit like your boss asking you to stay behind at the office and do a couple of extra things before you can go home and you won't get paid extra. They wouldn't like it.

[Javlingames]

I hate to hear stories like this, the 'one more' brigade can easily turn a great night into a bad one within seconds. They forget the last 3/4 hours that youve played all of their favourite songs. We should make a tip list to help us against the 'one more' brigade. This is what i do to soften the blow.

1 - During my last song (which is usually 5 minutes after the contracted ending) turn up the house lights. This is normally a good effect as people see it as a definate party is over moment

2 - Whilst the last song is playing, cover up your playout with a cloth, walk away and get changed into your de rig clothes. If no DJ is there, he cant play one more right??

3 -If anyone keeps asking for one more tell them your on a promise and must get to her asap, 'i would love to play your song, but you know how it is'' blah blah. Just remain quite jokey and diffuse it. I normally say, ive got to go, ive got an electronic tag on and i have to be home by midnight. Or ive left the dog with the neighbours and theyre cantonese and you know what they are like. Humour tends to diffuse these situations and its always worked for me.

[Shaun]

Sorry to hear of your bad experience. Drunk idiots are unfortunately part of the job, but we really shouldn't have to deal with idiots like this. I don't know if it's an age thing but I've had less of this type of thing the older I get. When I started DJing at 16 I had a few tales like this, but at almost 40 I can't remember the last time someone was abusive towards me.

Re: The one last song brigade. The first thing I do after the last song is unplug the speakers and take them off their stands. So anyone with half a brain will be able to realise that 'no speakers means no sound'. If anyone asks for more music I'll point towards the speakers, shrug and say "sorry", and just carry on packing up. Just remain polite and professional and carry on with what you are doing.

For what it's worth I think you handled the situation well. I'd be tempted to write to the owner/Manager of the venue and make them aware of the way their staff handled the situation. Their actions no doubt intensified an already volatile situation.

[JTRS]

1 - During my last song (which is usually 5 minutes after the contracted ending) turn up the house lights. This is normally a good effect as people see it as a definate party is over moment

2 - Whilst the last song is playing, cover up your playout with a cloth, walk away and get changed into your de rig clothes. If no DJ is there, he cant play one more right??



That's what I do, and so far I've never had any problems.

JTRS

[CRAZY K]

I started a thread on here a few weeks ago asking for some help with a playlist i received for a party (the playlist which had some country stuff) I wasn't 100% happy with doing the party, i just had a gut feeling it wasn't going to be fun for some reason. So last night was the night. Got there to find it was a tiny tiny tiny venue. But no problems setting up. Started playing music, had everyone up from about half 8 - 12. So far so good... Ended the night at 12, as agreed, was really happy with the night and knew everyone had had a great night.. . . . . Then came the "one more song" chant, so i played another two songs whilst packing up. When i took the first load out to the car park i didnt realise a man had followed me out to behind my van where he continued to abuse me and swear at me over the fact that i didnt play any more songs. I explained that i was only booked until 12, but this was not good enough for him. I quickly attempted to get back inside so i wasnt totaly alone. While clearing the rest of my things he continued to throw my business cards in my face while saying i was F:Censored: S:Censored: . . . i am usually more then happy to go on for longer (obviously at a cost) but due to an emergency, which i explained, i really couldn't do any longer. This whole situation has really made me feel like throwing in the tail. Its totly taken the fun out of the whole thing for me now:(

I personally think its a mistake to play on--I refuse to play any more after the last tune on the basis I have to get back to :Censored: Northamptonshire and I dont have time to play any more otherwise I will be getting home at sunrise.

The only time I gave in was at Canary Wharf last year where a Banker pulled out a £20 note and bribed me.:beer1: :beer1: :beer1:

I agree with Shaun take your speakers down and say ---its too late.

Abusive Drunks--I hate them:daft:

[Jonathan Ford]

I'm in the de-rig instantly brigade as well. Another thing I do is never update my gig laptop unless I'm working. That way, when I shut it down, it generally has updates to install, and when it's doing that I can just show the screen to the punter and say sorry.

In terms of dealing with a moron like this, sounds like you did a good job. If they don't get a reaction, they often disappear.

[welby]

Happened to me recently at a wedding and got a few nasty comments, but I stood my ground. The guests have hours of opportunity to request songs and by the end of the evening they are full of alchohol and think that they have a right to have "one more" and to be abusive if you do not comply.

I always make contact with the venue staff and tell them what time you finish and ask them switch the main lights on at the appropriate time. I always ask where the switch is so I can do it myself if needs be.

What I tend to do is announce throughout the night what time you will finish so there is no misunderstanding. And I too take the speakers down at the first opportunity after "time".

Another thing I do is start dismantling the rig, while the last song is playing (usually after time) as this sends out a clear message that you are finishing.

So please don't be put off by the actions of the minority.

It's a pity we don't have a public name and shame section.

[JAMdisco]

1 - During my last song (which is usually 5 minutes after the contracted ending) turn up the house lights. This is normally a good effect as people see it as a definate party is over moment

A good tip above...


2 - Whilst the last song is playing, cover up your playout with a cloth, walk away and get changed into your de rig clothes. If no DJ is there, he cant play one more right??

Followed by(IMO) a bad tip (above).
I would never leave my rig unattended even with a cloth over it - especially if there are abusive drunks - what's to say they won't 'have a go' at running your rig?

I've had people reaching over to try and turn it up on a few occasions, at this point I have been know to kill the music and say if they try that again, the disco will finish completely. They'll soon stop when everyone turns around to see the culprit reaching over my stuff. This usually works, followed by a 'sorry' :p :D

[STEVE HANLEY]

If the house lights are near me. I usually switch them all on during the second last song for a few seconds.

Then switch all the rig lights off and put the house lights back on pemanantly during the last song. It does tend to get the message across ( Usually:D :D )

[CRAZY K]

If the house lights are near me. I usually switch them all on during the second last song for a few seconds.

Then switch all the rig lights off and put the house lights back on pemanantly during the last song. It does tend to get the message across ( Usually:D :D )

Blimey, I think I would get lynched if I did that at a Wedding where the playlist says--

OUR LAST IS SONG IS ............................ ( SLOW/ROMANTIC)

:daft: :daft: :daft: :daft:

[Jonathan Ford]

If the house lights are near me. I usually switch them all on during the second last song for a few seconds.

Then switch all the rig lights off and put the house lights back on pemanantly during the last song. It does tend to get the message across ( Usually:D :D )


Blimey, I think I would get lynched if I did that at a Wedding where the playlist says--

OUR LAST IS SONG IS ............................ ( SLOW/ROMANTIC)

:daft: :daft: :daft: :daft:

I'm not a fan of house lights on while I'm playing the last songs, but I am very keen that they go on instantly when I'm done...as mine are off double-quick! I'm often found scurrying around a venue in the penultimate song to make this happen.

[8x18]

during the last song i ,

1 tell everyone this is the last song

2 thank bar staff , buffet supplier , everyone for staying to the end ,ect

3 last beat of track turn all disco lights off

4 same time as 3 MOST IMPORTANT THING turn on 2x 650watt blinders not led ones

5 straight away when blinders are on turn off amps , wait 20-30 seconds de-rig

ASAP

trust me this works