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Benny Smyth
29-07-2015, 09:21 AM
Just spinning off from the Playlist thread that Peter made.

Ok, here is the scenario: you're booked to perform at a wedding for a couple who are mid to late 20s. She likes listening to Capital Radio and particularly likes RnB. She especially likes what she would call 'Old Skool' RnB (late 90s, early 00s stuff from Usher, Fatman Scoop, Nelly etc.).

He, on the other hand, loves Dance music. So much so, they holiday every year to Ibiza and next year, they plan on going to Tomorrowland (it's a house music festival in Belgium, and is truly insane!). He really started listening to music during the late 90s when commercial trance became popular (ATB, Alice Deejay, Darude, Delerium etc.) and his love of house music built up from there.

They've briefly acknowledged that there are other guests at their wedding that may not appreciate their taste in music, but it's their big day, so stuff 'em, right?

So there you are. You've never met Nan before, but you're pretty sure that she won't like Jay Z's 99 Problems, nor is it likely that she'll be taking a roll in the snow to Dimitri Vegas & Like Mike's Ocarina. So how do YOU sell them the idea of incorporating for other people's taste whilst still making it their night?

I look at the evening entertainment the same way that I look at the entire day, and whilst there are hundreds of things that happen at every wedding, it's also different because the bride and groom have inserted their personalities into the day. So, for example, every bride has a wedding dress but every bride will pick a dress that expresses her as a person, be it strapless, lace, pink with yellow spots - whatever. Do people remember that it was a dress, or that particular dress?

Every wedding has a colour scheme, but the B&G will pick their colours, and not one that appears at all weddings. Flowers, bridesmaids and their dresses, groomsmen and their suits, table decorations, party favours - these all happen at all weddings, but it will be different each time. Again, people remember the detail of how it is different (groomsmen in converse, for example).

I sell the idea that the evening entertainment could be looked at in the same way. Not exactly the same songs, but if you doff the proverbial cap to 60s, Motown, 70s, Northern Soul, and anything else that's not what people remember. Nan, Grandad, Mom, Dad, Auntie, Uncle and many others may have fun dancing to The Beatles' I Saw Her Standing There but the memory most will take away will be the mini-Ibiza experience the DJ incorporated into the night, and the RnB set that made the bridal party do things that maybe shouldn't occur at a family occasion. You, as the DJ, insert the B&G's personalities into the night's festivities whilst keeping everyone else happy.

So how do you sell to your clients the idea of variety for their guests?

Shakermaker Promotions
29-07-2015, 09:55 AM
I never try to force my opinion on them but I will say that in my experience a full range of music to appeal to everyone is always a good idea.
I always tell them that yes, it is THEIR day but they should also take their guests into account. They ideally want to look around them during the evening and see happy faces enjoying what is going on NOT people looking bored and as if they can't wait to get out of the place because I am sure we'll all agree, it does happen.

Having done customer service roles for a number of years in the past, I know when and when not to be more or less blunt. Sometimes you can be, other times it's best not to and you try to get the point across as polite as possible. If I am being blunt I will use an example of where someone was working on my behalf back in the early days of my business. It's one of the only times where I have received some slightly negative feedback. It was a rock wedding......well, the Bride thought it was a rock wedding.
When the DJ spoke to me the following day about what had happened he said that he was told to stick to the request / playlist. I remember him texting me on the night to tell me that it was dire. 100 guests sat around watching the Bride and a couple of her friends on the dance floor throwing their heads around to Metallica and Megadeth.
He also told me that he decided at one point to chat to the Groom because he was concerned. The Groom (apparently) was really easy going and understood what could potentially happen so he told the DJ to do what he thought was best. Within no time at all, a change of styles saw the dance floor busy but this obviously didn't please the Bride. It was a case of me, me, me with that particular Bride and nobody else seemed to matter.

Had I been able to DJ myself (I'd busted my ankle so couldn't do it), I'd have done the exact same thing as the DJ and that was to try and 'save' their evening.
The feedback I received was certainly strange to say the least. In one sentence she thanked us and said everyone enjoyed themselves but in another sentence she said that she was a bit disappointed that the DJ hadn't kept to the request list.

I'd gone over everything and suggested a number of things during our pre-wedding meeting and it obviously went out the window. I was a bit narked by her feedback so I called her and more or less told her that the DJ used his experience and made a call that night to save the night from being a disaster. I also told her that at the end of the day she'd said everyone had enjoyed themselves and that was because of the DJ. Had he kept to her request list, she'd of had guests remembering her evening as boring. She got the message........eventually.

yourdj
29-07-2015, 11:10 AM
I did a rock wedding last Friday and the bride and groom love shout rock, but she was fine about playing all manner of other tracks.

I did sets of rock and modern, but kept in mind that they like rock based tracks and not cheese. The guests liked chart so i tended to sway between the two. At the point of bad company and the two tracks that played i saw 4 couple get up and leave, to what I assume was to go home as it was far too heavy for them, but it finished very well given the numbers (40). If she wanted just rock that no one knows then I would have turned down the booking. I actually did that recently and enlisted rock DJ Dave Mills to do the booking instead. :p

Rebel Rebel 4:30
Papa Roach - No Matter What (Acoustic v2) 3:52
Alive 5:41
Californication 5:21
Baba O'Riley 5:01
Here I Go Again 87 (CLASSIC ROCK - SLOW START) 4:35
The Boys Are Back In Town - Thin Lizzie 4:25
Go Your Own Way (Single/LP Version) 3:39
Little Lion Man (Radio Edit) (139 BPM) 3:28
She Sells Sanctuary 4:17
Through Glass (Single Edit) 4:04
Sweet Home Alabama 4:44
A Town Called Malice 2:51
Are You Gonna Be My Girl 3:35
I Gotta Feeling 4:49
We Found Love (Feat. Calvin Harris) 3:36
Happy 3:53
hey ya 4:13
Madness - Baggy Trousers 2:49
My Sharona 4:52
Pour Some Sugar On Me 4:53
Back In Black 4:18
greenday - when i come around 2:58
Dreaming of You 2:21
My Generation 3:25
Happy Song 3:59
Enter Sandman 5:31
Smells Like Teens Spirit 4:58
DIRTY DANCING (LONG MEGA MIX) Sweet Soul Megamix JT edit 15:08
Uptown Funk (Feat. Bruno Mars) 4:31
Cheerleader (Felix Jaehn Remix / Radio Edi) 4:21
Billie Jean 4:53
Finally 3:43
Sex IS on Fire 3:25
Bryan Adams - Summer of 69 3:37
The Killers - Mr. Brightside 3:44
80s - Bon Jovi - Living on a Prayer 4:10
Master Of Puppets 8:35
All About That Bass 3:09
Phil Collins - You Can't Hurry Love CANT 2:52
Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It) - beyonce 3:13
Valerie (Feat. Amy Winehouse) 3:39
Shake It Off 3:39
Blurred Lines 4:20
House Every Weekend (Original Mix) 4:57
What Is Love? 4:29
Don’t Stop Believing - Journey 4:18
Guns N' Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine 5:55
Bad Company 4:22
Forever (Radio Edit) 3:50
Gone Sovereign / Absolute Zero 7:40
UB 40 - Ub40 - Red Red Wine 5:21
Night Boat To Cairo 3:31
I'm gonna be 500 Miles 3:36
Dont Stop Me Now - Don't Don’t 3:31
Teenage Dirtbag 4:02
Hey Jude 7:04
I Don't Want to Miss a Thing 4:59
Everything 3:32

funkymook
29-07-2015, 11:33 AM
The trick is to get the client to agree to a compromise. This seldom happens if you tell them their carefulyl thought out 4 hour death metal playlist won’t work - no one likes to be told they wrong or can’t do something, especially by someone they’re essentially paying to do what they want.

My style is.... ‘brilliant list, really going to enjoy playing that’ (so I’m on their side, not against them)....’now what does your mum like?’...’Elvis’...’OK, we’d better play one or two for her, what about your dad?’.....’any other older relatives coming’.....maybe we should get their music out of the way earlier on and leave the heavier stuff to a bit later....etc (that’s a real life example from a few years ago, worked a treat).

Once they’ve agreed to one compromise the rest tends to be easy (basic sales technique, get them to say yes or agree to something to break down the barrier).


But you also have to ask why they want to micro manage their DJ? Find out why they don’t trust you to do your job with the minimum of guidance.
Usually it’s because they don’t think a mobile DJ will have any knowledge of their music tastes, if you have then that’s an easy one to overcome - if you haven’t then they’ve actually got a valid point!

Shakermaker Promotions
29-07-2015, 01:11 PM
I'm agreeing with you again Martin. I think I'll let you do all the talking as what you've said is more or less what I do.
I'm the same when I see a decent list ("Yes, great list, right up my street") but also in general too just to give them a bit of encouragement ("Great list, something for everyone there").

Excalibur
29-07-2015, 01:53 PM
Good question, Benny.
Answer: No idea. :confused:


I will think about it.



Right, I've thought about it, you give them ten songs, and tell them you'll pick the rest, cos that's your job. Seems to be standard practice nowadays.


Am I being serious? Who knows? :whistle:

Jim - Scotland's Party DJ
29-07-2015, 02:30 PM
*touch wood* It's never been an issue and is pretty much the main reason why I meet with clients prior to the wedding.

Of the few ridiculously long "must play" lists I've been given there's been enough on there I could use that would keep everyone happy.

Of the handful of folk who have been really keen on "having their music" and it's not been your usual wedding fayre, they've always accepted that they need to try and placate everyone otherwise their night will fall flat.

If all else fails I have a clause in my t's and c's that state that I ultimately decide on the music. We live ina 24 hour digital world and I'm not having folk slate me in real time on facebook or twitter because their pals have a hard on for show tunes and want nothing but at their wedding....