Your advice/input please

[KrazyKaz]

Mates rates???

My situation is this:-
My ex roadie/helper (not as close a mate as she used to be for reasons I won't go in to)wants me to do her daughters 13th birthday disco.Nice one!
I always did her birthdays for nothing - basically as a thank you for the help etc.
She said she happy to pay this time.It was going to be a joint party.I gave a small reduction in price. Now, the other girl has pulled out, leaving just the one.
They are now (I feel) putting me on a guilt trip.
Just spoken to the girl on MSN and when I asked her if it was still going ahead this was her reply

"yep i fink so, but dunnow cz it is alot of money so it that or i miss a prezent! haha

still want the party thow x"

I'm still waiting for the booking form to come back.

Do I reduce further to secure the gig?
Do I stick to my price and risk having another quiet night in?

What do you all think?

[Dragonfly]

difficult one i do mates rates personally for me its usually an easy night and a chance to get some cards out in a venue i may not have been in ...

that said i wouldnt give someone mates rates who asked for them .... im just like that ....won't be taken for granted.

[Discodaz]

As long as you are not out of pocket on the night, I would consider dropping the price. If you do a good job you might pick up extra work. Your friendship will be intact and your ex-roadie might well recommend you to family / friends, but make it clear that this is a one off price, for old times sake ;)

If you can't afford to drop the price, stick to your guns, but you might end up not working at all.

[KrazyKaz]

....won't be taken for granted.


exactly, they haven't directly asked but I just feel that's what they hinting at.

But............could just be my imagination.:bang:

[Corabar Steve]

Sounds like they're trying to pull a fast one.

Was there definately a second person to begin with?

[KrazyKaz]

Sounds like they're trying to pull a fast one.

Was there definately a second person to begin with?

Yep! definitely a second person at the start, don't know why they pulled out though

[Solitaire Events Ltd]

I reckon if you rely on the money and do it for a living, then they'll understand if you charge the full amount.

[CRAZY K]

Mates rates???

My situation is this:-
My ex roadie/helper (not as close a mate as she used to be for reasons I won't go in to)wants me to do her daughters 13th birthday disco.Nice one!
I always did her birthdays for nothing - basically as a thank you for the help etc.
She said she happy to pay this time.It was going to be a joint party.I gave a small reduction in price. Now, the other girl has pulled out, leaving just the one.
They are now (I feel) putting me on a guilt trip.
Just spoken to the girl on MSN and when I asked her if it was still going ahead this was her reply

"yep i fink so, but dunnow cz it is alot of money so it that or i miss a prezent! haha

still want the party thow x"

I'm still waiting for the booking form to come back.

Do I reduce further to secure the gig?
Do I stick to my price and risk having another quiet night in?

What do you all think?

Good friends understand--one of mine phoned up and said would you like to do the Disco for my Birthday Party--we dont mind paying the going rate for the area--somewhere in Hertfordshire.

As it happens I went as a guest in the end--but the offer was there.

CRAZY K

[Shaun]

Mates rates???

My situation is this:-
My ex roadie/helper (not as close a mate as she used to be for reasons I won't go in to)wants me to do her daughters 13th birthday disco.Nice one!
I always did her birthdays for nothing - basically as a thank you for the help etc.
She said she happy to pay this time.It was going to be a joint party.I gave a small reduction in price. Now, the other girl has pulled out, leaving just the one.
They are now (I feel) putting me on a guilt trip.
Just spoken to the girl on MSN and when I asked her if it was still going ahead this was her reply

"yep i fink so, but dunnow cz it is alot of money so it that or i miss a prezent! haha

still want the party thow x"

I'm still waiting for the booking form to come back.

Do I reduce further to secure the gig?
Do I stick to my price and risk having another quiet night in?

What do you all think?

For the situation you've mention I would stick to the rate already quoted. Give people an inch and they'll take a mile.

[Dragonfly]

to be honest kaz if its a joint party and you have still offered a reduction personally i would stick to your guns...... if i get an enquiry for a joint birthday party do i say "ooohhh two of them ill double the price " no one party one quote they pay half each .....

likewise if i had one booked and one person dropped out i wouldnt be thinking "aww bless ill only charge them half as much now"

if you are being made to feel guilty its a real shame because you tried to do your best from the outset.

its the person that has dropped out that has poured water on the camp fire so to speak, and meant that the party is now in doubt.

[secretDISCO]

I've learnt the hard way by now not doing family gigs:argue: ...and as for mates and mates rates........i dont have any so its not a problem:party1:
Seriously though!!!!!!! its a very fine line without hurting anyones feelings.
at the end of the day when your sitting on your couch, still sweating after loading all your gear in and out....and done the long gig and search about for the cheque/cash that isnt in your pocket....you have really got to ask yourself IS IT WORTH IT????????.....................................NO: whistle:
I do 4 charity gigs a year and my conscious is clear. amen !!!!!!!

[mike8863]

No-one has hit on how you feel about it yet Kaz.
Friend now or not, you obviously had some fun when you were friends, and now like i think other people would, you feel a little guilty, especially after reading the email from the birthday girl.
You do what you think is right for YOU, and no-one else. One thing I've learnt in life, no matter what happens, the world keeps turning, nothing stops because you, i, or whoever makes a mistake.
As for custom, is this party going to generate any new business for you?. Will the birthday girl be mortally offended because you didn't dj?, doubt it, and thats no reflection on you.
If you make the decision best for you, bearing in mind you know the whys and where fors etc, then you'll probably find thats the best decision all round.
Doe's that help you?????. Doe's it heck :bang: :bang: :D :D.

Mike

[Tony Scott]

Kaz,

Questions I would ask myself:


*What will you earn if you do it for 1/2 of your mates rate price - will you be happy with this?

*Do you like the 13yr old?

*Are you likely to be just sat at home if you don't do the gig?

*Do you want to build bridges with the Mother?


If you answer mostly yes then do the gig if not don't! :)

[KrazyKaz]

To answer some questions.

Yes, I like the birthday girl, and she has specifically asked me to do the gig.

Mum and daughter have both said having the party will lessen the amount of prezzies bought, but........... mum told me she has bought her a laptop!!And thinking of a getting her a new mobile too!!

The gig might get me work, then again, might not, bearing in mind I know a fair number of the guests anyway - one of them is my daughter - LOL

I believe, at the end of the day, that if mum had a problem with the money side of things, the party would have been cancelled.

Mum had also said, "I won't get anyone else at that price" (hmm... does that mean she enquired already? Who knows!!!)

It's all systems go, my daughter got her invitation! And we buy a prezzie too!!

[Penfold42]

To answer some questions.

Yes, I like the birthday girl, and she has specifically asked me to do the gig.

Mum and daughter have both said having the party will lessen the amount of prezzies bought, but........... mum told me she has bought her a laptop!!And thinking of a getting her a new mobile too!!

The gig might get me work, then again, might not, bearing in mind I know a fair number of the guests anyway - one of them is my daughter - LOL

I believe, at the end of the day, that if mum had a problem with the money side of things, the party would have been cancelled.

Mum had also said, "I won't get anyone else at that price" (hmm... does that mean she enquired already? Who knows!!!)

It's all systems go, my daughter got her invitation! And we buy a prezzie too!!

Based on that I would say do it but your not me so not much help.:)

[Dillmiester]

I must be a soft touch because ive lost count of the amount of times ive agreed to provide free discos for friends on the basis of "all the beer you can drink". It never happens as they get too drunk to remember to keep me topped up!
I will learn one day.
Even now I have a disco booked for a mates rate of £100 which is probably too cheap but hey ho...

[Have a disco]

I hate to say this mate but there are no friends when it comes to business wether family or not you must stick to your guns on the price admit it is sevrely reduced and then stick to your guns remember how many times you have given freebies and work out the cost. No such things as mates rates it one price for all as every tom **** and harriet will say but I know matey whom you did for at etc etc

People will respect your honesty otherwise get outta the game your in it for all the wrong reasons IT's A BUSINESS

Sorry to be blunt mate?????

[BeerFunk]

I hate to say this mate but there are no friends when it comes to business wether family or not you must stick to your guns on the price admit it is sevrely reduced and then stick to your guns remember how many times you have given freebies and work out the cost. No such things as mates rates it one price for all as every tom **** and harriet will say but I know matey whom you did for at etc etc

People will respect your honesty otherwise get outta the game your in it for all the wrong reasons IT's A BUSINESS

Sorry to be blunt mate?????
I agree with your stance, I don't think anyone wouldn't, but 'in it for all the wrong reasons'? I would say the main reasons are enjoyment of music, money, and entertaining people.

I often agree to do discos for 'mates' and 'mates of mates', and most of the time, I regret it.
The last one I did, they asked me to help them run the buffet down too, as they didn't have transport - so I agreed, thinking, if I'm set up and ready to go... why not? Well, it turned out that they couldn't get into the venue until 6, and the start time was 8. I'm not quite sure why or how it happened, but I ended up running the buffet down first, before even getting my gear into the venue, which meant I couldn't start until well after 8. This resulted in me rushing and sweating to get everything set up - well I'm sure we all know what it's like! So, despite the remainder of the night going as well as anyone could have hoped, I decided to carefully consider any 'mates' discos in the future.

[flatliners]

Text talk is no longer tolerated.

Post edited. Admin

[Shaun]

Kaz,

Did you come to a decision on what to do?.

[KrazyKaz]

Kaz,

Did you come to a decision on what to do?.

It was never a question of whether to do the gig or not, it was the price that was more of an issue, so I am going to do the gig as arranged, at the price I quoted. The girl wants me to do it, and at the end of the day I haven't got a problem with her, just didn't like feeling I was being took for granted and put me on a guilt trip.

One thing that did come out of this is ....

I WILL NOT BE TAKEN FOR GRANTED ANYMORE! :mad:

(sorry for shouting)

[Shaun]

One thing that did come out of this is ....

I WILL NOT BE TAKEN FOR GRANTED ANYMORE! :mad:





Absolutely. :clap:

[Steve 'B']

I done a gig for a friend who was a plumber. It was a wedding, so all the best gear i had went in t the gig. Made the night a night to remember.

That night got all my gear stuck in a lift! Eventually got home at about 7 and had to go and pick the gear up late Sunday. What a nightmare!!

one year on or so, I have just got a new place of my own......

Needed some work done in the bathroom.

Called mate!!

He said, I am so busy this week. Might be able to come and have a look next week. I said I will wait for his call.

Next week....... No call!!

Rang again........

Oh I am so busy with this, that and the other.

I said, I tell you what. You call me when you get some time to have a look.

Two months on, still have not heard.

[electricnite]

cover your expenses and smile and say to yourself. lesson learnt. got the t shirt mate